Monday, June 16, 2008

Hi kids,

Ok, I have not updated, and this one is going to be brief. Whole lotta stuff been happening and will continue to do so. Here's a brief run down:

- Watched 14 inning Mets game Wednesday (they won)

- Saw Gypsy starring Patti Lupone, where I got an apple from one of the strippers in act 2 and had Ms. Lupone sign it at the stage door, thereby creating a Luponeapple, a fruit that is the envy of fruits everywhere.

- Bus trip to Connecticut to rehearse with the Hartford Chorale in preparation for the big thing happening soon:

My invasion of Red China.

I'm pretty sure the "Red" part wasn't really necessary, but let's be honest; if I limited this blog to things that were necessary it would be largely non-existent.

*** Completely unrelated note. Over the past five minutes I unleashed a torrent of profanity the likes of which my office has probably never heard. I mean the sort of turn-the-air-blue, sailor-blushing incantations that could rouse C'thulhu from his slumber.

Dead but dreaming, bitches.

How it happened was thusly: I was feeding my rubber band ball, helping it to grow. Evidently and predictably, one of the rubber bands I was adding was old and slightly decayed. Stretching it over the ball was just too much, and it snapped and shot straight into my left eye. For those of you not in the know, that's my favorite eye, my good eye, my shooting eye.

Recycled caption: When hipsters learn to fly.

So after a good session of cursing like Popeye off his Tourette's meds, I'm back and we now return you to your irregularly scheduled post***

Ah yes, going to China. The Lion's Den. The heart of 21st Century Communism.

Pretty much any time I would have had available for the rest of the week to update this blog will now be devoted to making lists of things to pack, packing, and panicking. I'm very excited. Not so much about the 20 hour direct flight from Newark to Beijing. But the rest of it is badass.

I'm going to go see the sights and try to have some fun without being thrown in jail for the rest of my life. Come to think of it, that's pretty much what I do here. Though I suppose in the US there's a lesser chance of my remains being sold to Bodies... The Exhibition.

I don't even like basketball.

Oh dear... even I found that to be in questionable taste. Well, too late to change it now. So yeah, I'm going to China. You'll most likely not be able to contact me at all from June 20th to June 30th. Email maybe.

You cats have a good time, and wish me luck with my Globetrotting adventures.

Love always,


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